Is Tinder the Right Way to Find a Serious Relationship?

When it comes to online dating there are a lot of options out there. Tinder is a very popular dating app and it has even been featured on television shows such as ABC’s Grey’s Anatomy. But… how serious do people take Tinder? Is this where you will find your everlasting love?

Perhaps you have heard from someone you know that Tinder is the umm… sex app. Or perhaps you have heard there are people looking for something more special than a quick hookup. Are these people right or can Tinder serve dual functions?

We’ll break it down for you here, so you can have a chance to see if Tinder is truly the best place for you to find a serious relationship.

Read: Top Dating Apps to Find a Relationship

Tinder app screenshot

Swipe – The Concept of Tinder

Before we can answer the question, we need to fully understand the premise behind Tinder—because it matters to this discussion.

The concept of Tinder is very simple—you upload a photo to create a profile… and that’s pretty much it. Once you create a profile you will be shown available singles in your nearby area. You can touch the screen and either swipe left for a “no” or swipe “right” for a yes. If you swipe right and the person also swipes right for you, then you are matched.

Is this “match” based upon something significant, or is it strictly based upon what you look like? Truth be told, it is 100 percent based upon your looks. Physical attraction is very important in an online dating match, but there is so much more to take into consideration other than someone’s appearance. When you are seeking a serious relationship, you want that person to have some shared common interests and lifestyle choices to yours.

Match Time

Once you’ve swiped and gotten a match, you can start chatting with them privately. This is your opportunity to have friendly back and forth banter with them and find out what their reason is for being on Tinder. In our experience, people on Tinder are not shy at all about why sharing why they are on Tinder. Whether it is for casual sex, a quickie, or for a “real” relationship, users have been quick and honest with their responses.

Reminder, these “matches” are exclusively based upon mutual attraction. Most chats do not amount to much. The average Tinder user spends upwards from eight hours a week swiping and chatting on the app. If 50 matches are made in one week, eight may seem decent enough to chat up more. Of those top five matches, you should expect to meet one IRL (in real life).

Chat – The “Important” Part of Tinder

Unless you are extremely vain, the chatting part is really the most important part in the whole Tinder process. You already know there is mutual attraction, but is there anything else there? If you are seeking a serious relationship, then you need to first establish why your match is there. If they are looking for something casual, then they won’t be a good match for you.

Most chatting situations won’t lead to much since a majority of Tinder users are reportedly there for short term relationships. People on Tinder are interested in quick hookups, out of town “tour guide” hookups, or even looking to cheat on their spouse (yes, we’ve seen it all). Try not to go into any mutually matched chats expecting too much.

Most users start chats with, “Hey how’s it going, want to hookup tonight?” Please note, they are not referring to meeting up at a mutual location to grab some food, they are talking about meeting up for sex. We have not heard of anyone using Tinder for prostitution, but we have heard stories of this happening from time to time. Tinder is very good at trying to catch these profiles and deleting them, but always be leery of anyone offering up sex out the gate.

The Bottom Line

Look, the truth is if you are a good person looking for a relationship with meaning behind it, something that could become serious and long-term, then Tinder is not the right place for you. We do not deny that the platform of swiping left, or right is fun and offers instant gratification, but it is not designed to meet the love of your life. You will waste a lot of your time on Tinder if you’re looking for a serious relationship though, time you could have spent on a much better online dating site.